1 - onibaba
vision/concept, influences, work in progress pictures
Written August 1st, 2023, covering art from May 25th - Jun 4th, 2021
The onibaba wasn't the first painting I made, but I drafted the first four together in a batch. So I'm choosing to start with my future self-portrait: the onibaba, or demon hag.
CONCEPT:
I wanted to depict a future version of myself, who has lived through many catastrophic events, who is more in relationship with her environment, and who exists in opposition to nationalism or exploitation. A version of myself that could be perceived as an onibaba. I wanted the painting to at first look like the onibaba existed in the past, in the Edo period with her straw rain cape and wooden walking stick. But add in small details so when you look closer, you realize that there are roads for cars in the background. The onibaba exists in a future that resembles the past, or in a place where the past and the future blend together.
I've been looking forward to being an elder for a long time, and creating visions of what it would look like to be an elder through climate collapse have been grounding for me.
INFLUENCES:
I really liked Toriyama Sekien's Yamauba (mountain fairy/old woman) and his Oshiroi-baba (white face powder hag) who are related to the onibaba idea.
I really was inspired by the yama uba just being topless, one with the mountain. What does she even need to wear a shirt for?? she's a hag!!
This was the first of the yōkai creatures where I was really trying to embody the inbetween space between human and oni. Jami's essay describes the Woman from Tomo taking millet jelly and shaping her hair into horns, thus becoming an oni. My onibaba's horns are even softer, made from the whisps of her hair. My friend groupchat, the Young Bendies-- who often bemoan our asian baby hairs aggressively turning into tufts-- inspired this bit.
She's just an old woman in the mountains, but some may say she's a demon!
Also I heavily referenced my two grandmothers, assuming that i will turn into them!!
my grandma on the Ige (mom's) side in 2022
my ama on the Lin (dad's) side in 2021
Me, posing in 2021 in my Chicago apartment. I did not have a photo reference for the saggy titties.
PROCESS PHOTOS
initial research doodles. yurei on the top, onibaba on the bottom
my final sketch. thumbnails below.
oh see those in the bottom right are my actual thumbnail images, then i made the big circle sketch after those.
video of me painting in facial features on the onibaba
final painting, just need details
months later when i cut them out for scanning
Key Memories?
Around the same time I started working on this painting I also worked on a commission for a dear friends and doushii//comrades: anne, for her partner jj.
The piece was honor of jj's grandma on their Ueunten side who had semi-recently become an ancestor. JJ's grandma Chiyo was Okinawan and lived in Kauai, and said that she intentionally grew cotton and sugarcane in her garden. She said something like: "we grow cotton to remember Black people's enslavement in America, and we grow sugarcane to remember that we [Okinawans] came to Hawai'i to work on the plantations."
This was such a precious lesson from an elder in how to build ritual and relationship with the land, in a way that helps us remember hard legacies !!!